Episode #823

Date March 20, 2017

Run Time 1:09:07

Rebecca Vigil, Ray Christian and Paul Gilmartin share stories about conflicted relationships.

Song: RISK! Theme by Wormburner and John Sondericker

Song: In 3’s by Beastie Boys

Live Story: Words and Music by Rebecca Vigil

Interstitial: Blinded by the Something or Other by Jeff Barr

Live Story: The Razor’s Edge by Ray Christian

Song: Can You Get to That by Mavis Staples

Live Story: Covert by Paul Gilmartin

Song: The Borderline by Goldspot



Download: MP3

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7 years ago

Paul… wow. This is one of the most powerful stories I’ve ever heard. I love you for sharing this. I love you for being human. I love you, man!

7 years ago

Love hearing my favorite Storyteller Ray Christian.

7 years ago

It’s because it’s the year twenty17

7 years ago

Hey there!

So I’ve been a fan of the podcast for a while, ever since I first saw a show in college.

I’ve heard people honestly talk about hilarious things they’ve done, and occasionally regretful things they’ve done, honestly and openly, without the need to pander to the crowd – I love hearing about people’s honest human experience.

However, this last podcast, where the speaker Ray Christian talked flippantly about giving someone permanent nerve damage so bad it ruined his career…I’ve never been so viscerally unhappy listening to a podcast.

I know you didn’t do this crime. And I know a spectrum of unfiltered human vignettes is the crux of what your show is! I’m not really sure what I’m getting at here…but I wanted to ask for a response on your thinking on this.

7 years ago

Hey Drew, I think that’s an understandable reaction to the story, for sure. It’s quite common for listeners to feel like, “Huh. I’m not so sure I can get behind what that storyteller did,” or, “Yikes, I don’t think that storyteller’s interpretation of what happened to them is not how I would have interpreted something like that happening to me.”

7 years ago

Paul, thank you for sharing your story. I, too, experienced emotional incest. My mother’s needs, her opinions, her emotions engulfed everything else. It was as though our identities were fused, and she became enraged any time I expressed a differing opinion or feeling. Her voice was the only voice. I feel so fortunate to have been able to recognize what was going on, escape that toxic relationship, to set boundaries, and experience a healthy partnership with my spouse as an adult. My heart goes out to you, and I so appreciate your voice.

7 years ago

I’m from brasil, São Paulo, and love the show.

7 years ago

Dear Kevin,,
I really love the show. It has been great company to me over the years during all my projects.. You really are exceptionally talented with the Interstitial music, both in choosing just the right piece and putting your own creative touch on it. it’s amazing how you can use them to weave together an episode and also create musical comments. I’m really happy for you that you have found your “calling” – A place where you can flourish and thrive. You are an inspiration to all of us.
Thank you,
PS, sorry if this shows up more than once, I am having a hard time proving that I am not a robot!

7 years ago

Thank you for airing Paul’s story. I never thought a podcast would lead me to a therapy breakthrough, but there it is. I will be forever grateful.

7 years ago

The raw truth of Paul’s story is stunning.

In the sea of great stories that Risk has aired over the years, this one really stands out. Thank you, Paul, for sharing so eloquently those experiences that are hugely difficult to put into words, to make sense of. Wow.

7 years ago

Great Episode. Among the awesome things already mentioned, Jeff Barr’s “Blinded By The Something Or Other” made me LOL. I think all listeners of a certain age immediately recognize that moment of unintelligibility.

Your Name
7 years ago

Paul thank you for sharing that story I didn’t know about this kind of rape a person could go through, it should be made more aware. Also as far as how you said that kids should be taught in school about how to deal with emotions, we have something like that called peer counseling. Its where students basically talk to other student amd help them through whatever they need and the counselors are taught how to recognize emotions and help those student who would otherwise not want to talk about their problems to an adult.

Mark Redmond
7 years ago

LOVED Ray Christian’s story. I’ve heard him on The Moth before, always good, but this one was outstanding, his best yet.

6 years ago

Very powerful story, Paul. I wholeheartedly agree that mental health is totally overlooked in our country. It needs to become a part of our conversations. Even learning simple, healthy, coping skills would make a difference in some peoples life. I know I didn’t learn that from my folks or anyone else until I was in my forties and took upon my self to seek mental help. Thank you for sharing your story. Blessings!

6 years ago

Paul, thank you so much for your story. My father covertly molested me until I was 18 and he overtly molested me and my mom kicked him out. Your story resonated so much with me, I just appreciated it so much. I’m not in therapy and I don’t know how to deal now, but maybe someday I will find a therapist I can trust.

6 years ago

Thank you Paul for reviling such a horrible childhood memorie. But today you introduced me to an abuse that I thought was my fault! I was a victim but asked for the attention of my perpetrator and always thought it was my fault.
Thank you and I am sorry for your loss of childhood too!

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